Monday, March 30, 2009

What Advice To Give?

In the past few weeks we have looked at “What Is A Healthy Church?” I can think of very few people in the last 50 years or so who has done more to bring believers back to a proper understanding of conducting Church the biblical way than Mark Dever. I have blogged, and we have discussed in our services that one of the primary reasons we have church is because of the fact that we can not run this race alone. However, if we understand this, there will be times that our brothers and sisters in Christ will seek counsel; which brings us to the title of this blog; What Advice To Give? There are times I confess that as I am hearing a problem and in my mind I am thinking: “how can I help these people?” Now I know that may not breed confidence in your Pastor as a member of Trinity, but hear me out. When this thought comes (and to be honest it tends to always be there initially), God inevitably leads my thoughts to a passage in my favorite Chapter in the Bible. Ps. 119. In Ps. 119:97-99 “Oh, how I love Your law! It is my mediation all the day. You, through Your commandments make me wiser than my enemies; For they are ever with me. I have more understanding than all my teachers, For Your testimonies are my mediation.” It becomes very clear to me, that I have absolutely nothing in and of myself to offer these people I am counseling. I am a year shy of my 20th year in the ministry, surely that should give me something to say to them, right? I think not! I know of men whose mantra is/was “I’ve been doing this 20 years, or 30 years” - that means nothing to me nor should it to you. In fact, if they have to announce that over and over they are doing so to boost your confidence in them, not the Word. Doing something a long time doesn’t mean you’re are good at it, and being older doesn’t mean you’re wiser. For instance, there are turtles that are around today that were here at the founding of this country, but I do not see any one going to them for counsel… however some people would be better off going to them than to some counselors or even ministers I know. So what advice are we to give? Well to put it plain and simple - it must be biblical. Over and over in Psalm 119 we see that the only thing that produces wisdom is the Word of God. Not age, or longevity in the ministry or in the Church. Certainly if you have walked closely with God and have been in His Word for 20 years the counsel you give would be invaluable but only if it is backed up with the Word of God.

My wife graduated from Auburn University with her Master’s in Counseling - with what she received from that institution, she could hang a sign on the door and get paid to counsel. There is good money to be made in that, but what she received in a secular institution that gives hypotheses about man, is equal to giving a Benadryl to a cancer patient. In the long run it will do nothing. While we can learn communication styles and people skills, the source of our counsel must be TRUTH. The only way to help someone is to get to the source of the problem, that problem begins in the heart. We are fallen men, with fallen natures; the only thing that can help our heart is TRUTH. Knowing that I will give an account of every idle word I speak, when I am giving advice I had better make sure it is biblical. I had better back up what I say with the Word of God. All of this to say that every believer can help another believer by speaking the Word of God to them, it is not just sufficient to save us and keep us, it is sufficient to guide us and lead us. To make this crystal clear, there is nothing that I face that I do not need to first find out what the Word of God says about it. If I know what God thinks about it, then I can know with confidence that the advice I give is truly helpful.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Great Questions:

I have stated several times in our worship services how we as a body need one another. While we are dependent upon Christ alone, Christ set it up that we need to have one another. The beauty of our immediate family is that I have part of the church at home with me. I need my wife - she above anyone on this earth loves me and knows me. She knows my weaknesses, she knows my struggles and God certainly uses her in my sanctification. Also, as surprising as it is, she needs me! I know her as she knows me, and God uses me not only as her Pastor, but also as her husband. She knows that many times what goes on in our home (especially my sin and even goofy mishaps) can, and often will, be used as an illustration somewhere down the road - and not once has she ever asked me not to share something. She knows that I will gladly share my weaknesses, if it means growth in sanctification for our congregation.

All of that to say, I believe the one area we miss out on is that God can greatly use our children in our sanctification. How many times do you see them act like you act when things don’t go their way? How many times do you hear them say something to their sibling in a tone that you know you have demonstrated to them? In fact, those weaknesses that my boys exhibit which I know are in my life as well, are the ones I seem to come down on the hardest. I do not want them to have the same areas of sin. However, I know that is inevitable because when two sinners say “I do” and they are blessed with children, the kids always receive our nature and we have little sinners running around! But these sinners, who have received the grace of God, as they grow can be a tool in the hands of our Lord to help further my sanctification if I die to self and give them permission. They understand they are not to correct Daddy when I get angry and respond wrong to something they have done (it would be poor judgment to say the least for them to tell me I had sinned at that moment) - they are children, and they do not know what is in my heart. However, there have been times I have had to come apologize for a wrong reaction.

All of this to say, I do need them - but there should be an appropriate time and place that this happens. You know, a place where they can talk to me - about me. We have created this in our home… about one time a month as we are doing our family time I give them a list of questions that I saw in a book. I believe it was entitled “Stand”, but it doesn’t matter - the author stated he received the list from someone else also. But below you will find a list of probing questions you may be nervous about asking. The first time I did this, one of my boys said: “Boy Daddy, those were some tough questions” and, to say the least sometimes this work of sanctification is painful. I hope these help:

1. How are your devotions?
2. What is God teaching you?
3. In your own words, what is the gospel?
4. Is there a specific sin you are aware of that you need my help defeating?
5. Are you more aware of my encouragement or my criticism?
6. What’s Daddy most passionate about?
7. Do I act the same a church as I do when I’m at home?
8. Are you aware of my love for you?
9. Is there any way I have sinned against you that I’ve not repented of?
10. How am I doing as a dad?
11. How have Sunday’s sermons impacted you?
12. Does my relationship with your Mom make you excited to be married?

Saturday, March 21, 2009

MARCH MADNESS AND OTHER GAMES!

Anyone who knows me understands that I love sports. I watch Sports Center, I enjoy March Madness, I enjoy filling out my bracket and competing with many of my friends at Trinity and around the country (thanks to the internet), as to who can guess the Final Four and ultimately the National Champion. My boys are enjoying baseball and I love watching them. Football has always been “it” in the Everson household and we can’t wait for fall each year. In fact on April 11, 2009 I will have the great honor of watching my beloved Georgia Bulldogs in the Red and Black Spring game on ESPN. I will watch it and love every moment of it. I will watch the first couple of hours at least of the NFL Draft. I will watch the preseason games, and especially the college football games. I love those fall Saturdays. I played football most of teen life, and have surgery scars to prove it. I wouldn’t trade anything for those days.

I am saying all of this, not to give you a list of my sports, but to give you a list of my credentials. There is a tendency to believe that when a Pastor preaches about faithfulness to our Lord, they believe he is preaching about setting priorities that he has no clue about. That he has always sat around and read the Bible and listening to Bill Gaither Reunions all his life. That is far from the truth. We wrestle or “rassle”, we enjoy ball - we love all of those things, but we must teach our boys THE PRIORITY. All of this to say, there are some great things that sports can teach children, but I would submit to you that there is nothing that sports can teach me that pouring my life into a church and the Word of God can’t teach me. I learn importance of depending on others, and others depending on me (aka Team Work). I learn the importance of what ever I do, doing it all for the glory of God (aka giving my best), I learn the importance of integrity (aka keeping the rules), I learn perseverance (aka toughness), I learn to value relationships (aka team unity). As I think about it, there is nothing sports taught me that church could not have. But there are plenty of things Church has taught me that sports couldn’t. I learned the ways of righteousness; I learned the importance of marriage; the way to love my family; the value of integrity; the importance of being a giver; the importance of accountability; what God really values and on and on.

Again don’t misunderstand me; I love sports, all kinds. My boys have played everything from soccer to mixed martial arts. But I would rather them see my excitement and overwhelming joy when they memorize scripture or read a book about Martin Luther or Lottie Moon. I am glad they know how to throw a football, but I am much more concerned that they learn how to lead their home! If you get upset when I mention your child probably isn’t going pro, you are either dreaming or bowing before the wrong god. I played for a 4A State Champion Football team - we were number one in the nation during my senior year, and I have a very large trophy and a state championship ring. Can I tell you where they are now? I have no clue. I have never shown my boys, I have never talked about it to them. Their uncle and their granddad played college ball - can I tell you what that means to me or them? Not very much, I have never placed that before them as a wonderful goal. God has called us to grow godly adults - not professional athletes. I came across this article http://www.humanismbyjoe.com/Academics_Not_Athletics.htm, it states that only 4 out of every 100,000 white males ever make it to the professional ranks. That means .004% ever make it! If a doctor gave you that chance of living another year - you would go pick out your coffin. Of this .004% the majority have a career lasting less than five years. Did you know statistically speaking; your child has a better chance of making a hole in one TWICE and bowling a 300 game in his life than becoming a professional athlete!

All this to say, I can point to countless men and women who had truth take root in their life and they have stayed faithful to the things of God! I can put countless men in front of my boys from the Word of God, to biographies, to men in this church who serve and are faithful to their families - those are the ones I want my boys to see as heroes. If my boys have a heart that longs after God, there is a 100% chance they can achieve that goal. In the long run they could care less if I play Quarterback for the New England Patriots, but it will matter to them and have a profound effect upon them if I love their Mom and them. Just something for me and you to think about as my boys averaged spending over an hour a day practicing ball that they enjoy playing and we enjoy watching. But it is more important that they see Christ, and the Church will always rank above practice, games and ball. Only those things done for Him will last.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

A MAJOR MARK:

I don’t know of a mark that is more important than this mark of a true church. This statement, I hope doesn’t diminish the other marks, but I would state without hesitation that if there is not, as Dever puts it: “Biblical discipleship and growth” the other marks will be nonexistent. Without discipleship and growth there will be no desire for our congregation to be accountable to one another, nor will there be a desire to get the gospel right, nor a desire for biblical theology and so on. I believe this is the hinge on which all the other marks swing. A person who never grows in godliness can hardly call themselves a believer. The fact that one is alive spiritually necessitates that there is growth. That certainly doesn’t mean that there are never any set backs, but it means that there is a passion to become more like Christ. There is an overwhelming desire today especially among pastors to tout numbers. More numbers mean more recognition, more recognition means more popularity, and more popularity will result in more praise - this praise has a tendency to increase pride which certainly none of us need any help with! Now this certainly shouldn’t diminish the desire to see more people come into our church - we should be passionate and joyful about seeing people come to Christ. But we must keep in mind that all we must do is read through the churches in revelation and we will find most of them seem to be doing wonderfully on the outside, but Christ sees them as deficient on the inside. While I have enjoyed seeing people saved and rejoice in the numbers who have joined our church over the last several weeks, I must realize that this is not what should drive Trinity Baptist Church. After all, there will be times we have several decisions and we will rejoice over that, but I we will not go into depression when there are no decisions-we will have confidence in the Word of God and will keep proclaiming it! There are times that the “growth” is in spiritual knowledge and depth among the flock – not necessarily in new decisions or converts. We must trust God to know what He is doing and when He wants to do it!

Now usually I spend a great deal of time emphasizing some of the major points of our book “What is a Healthy Church?”, but below I want to tell you what we at Trinity Baptist Church should be rejoicing in. As great as our Sunday School and Worship attendance has been, what is utterly shocking is our numerical growth on Sunday night! I feel the need to highlight some areas of what biblical growth really looks like:

• We have had great attendance on Monday night outreach!
• I had a couple come up to me Sunday night who has been married 49 years and shared with me how God was working in their marriage.
• I have had multiple members come up to me, ready to begin ministries and not waiting for the new Pastor to begin a “new program.”
• There are informal gatherings of church members after every single Sunday night service. Even after listening to the long winded Preacher!
• There have been some instances of members coming together for reconciliation.
• Our members at Trinity have been giving in incredible ways! From our general offering, missions and our Love Offering. This shows our focus is not just fixed within our walls but looking out to the “fields.”
• We have had husbands begin leading their family’s in sacrificial ways.
• We have had wives learning biblical submission.
• You have been joyfully receiving the Word of God each Sunday and Wednesday.

These are just a few of the biblical growth signs that are going on at Trinity! You have made it a joy not only to preach but also to Pastor you! There are some who desire for their church to be on the front of the state paper, others who long for a certain number of people, at Trinity let’s make a commitment to first and foremost be a church that is growing in holiness and we will not compete with Christ. After all it is Christ who said “I will build my Church.”

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The Difficult Mark

We live in a “mind your own business” world, and sadly enough this is the dominant attitude even in churches today. If a church member gets tired of his wife or her husband and runs out to find a new one, in our day the expectation is that the church certainly doesn’t agree with that, but…what can we do? So we do nothing. If a “member” desires to come to church on Easter and Christmas and never come the rest of the year, and they want to live like the world, then we should pray for them - but we should never be so cold, arrogant and unloving as to say anything to them. The world would tell us that our religious beliefs and our faith is “personal”. This attitude comes from a total misunderstanding of my last post on membership. If a person doesn’t understand what being a “member" of a church means, they will not understand what discipline means. One of my favorite lines in “What is a Healthy Church” is when Dever states: “Membership draws a boundary line around the church, marking the church off from the world. Discipline helps the church that lives inside of that boundary line stay true to the very things that are cause from drawing the line in the first place.” Now, before I speak to this subject one of my dearest and most respected friends in the ministry just wrote on a very similar subject to this on his blog; you can find this at http://pastormikestone.blogspot.com/2009/03/how-many-members-do-we-have.html

This difficult mark of discipline is frowned upon in our “anything goes” society. Our society believes that everyone should be able to do what feels right to them without fear that someone would have something to say about it. We even see it in the prevalent parenting skills taught today – be their friend but don’t correct them. But we need to remember two things: (1) Not all discipline is negative: When we hear discipline we always think of correction or a spanking. However, I believe every one of us would agree that there is a need for discipline in our lives. This positive discipline or “formative discipline” serves much the same way as braces on teeth, or reminding your children to chew with their mouths closed. You know, the things that shape you. From a spiritual perspective every sermon, every truth of Scripture we have encountered could be part of our formative discipline. (2) Negative discipline is positive: I have two boys and they each have characteristics of both Michele and me – but unfortunately, the most dominant characteristic they have is our sin nature! Because of that, there are times we must discipline them. I do not enjoy it - I do not desire it. In fact my life would be easier many times if I just ignored their misbehavior. But the most selfish, arrogant thing I can do is to let them do what they want. If I were to choose to ignore their sin, by my silence I am approving of it! But, I am also thinking of my comfort over theirs and I am thinking that my way is better than what the Word of God has instructed me to do. Now if this is true in my family life, this is also true in the local family of God. The Church is commanded to be set apart: believers are to live holy lives….how do we do this in our sin nature if we are not held accountable by other believers in our Church? Discipline, as with parenting, reminds me that boundaries are consistent and real and that when I cross those acceptable boundaries, I need to reign it in and get back to what I know I should be doing.

Very few people will discuss Matthew 18, Luke 17, 1st Corinthians 5 and 6. But they will run to Matthew 7:1 “Judge not that you be not judged” but that certainly doesn’t prohibit all types of judging. In fact reading this chapter we see there is a righteous kind of judgment. Even looking at Matthew 7:6 I must make a judgment as to the difference between dogs and swine and that of true believers. In Scripture he has given the power to the state to judge (Rom. 13:1-7). He intends for believers to judge ourselves (1st Corinth.11:28, Heb. 4, 2nd Pet. 1:5-10). The Church is to judge (Matt.18, 1st Corinth. 5-6). This should not surprise us, after all if we can’t say how a child of God should not live, then we certainly have no right to say how a child of God should live. In order for us to glorify God as His body we must be able to show a distinction between the church and the world. The idea of holding one another accountable is not new; in fact, Pre-Civil War Southern Baptist excommunicated nearly 2 percent of their membership every year. Just so you know…during this same time frame Southern Baptist churches grew at TWICE the rate of the population growth. Certainly this issue could turn into abuse, or be self serving. But to be fair, every thing the church is called to do could turn into abuse. This is precisely why we need one another. This is the reason the church is involved in this - after all, it is called church discipline not staff or deacon discipline. The key is doing this with brokenness, understanding the need for the cross during this process. The goal of the church is always restoration.

I certainly can’t write all there is to write on this blog but I am going to close with the 5 reasons Dever states discipline should be done:

1. The good of the disciplined individual: 1st Cor. 5:1-5, this man was lost in his sin, thinking God approved of his having an affair with his father’s wife. The Church had to respond to this.

2. For the good of other believers: 1st Tim. 5:20

3. For the health of the church as a whole: 1st Corinth. 5:6-8

4. For the witness of the church: This is a tool for evangelism. 1st Corinth. 5:1,
1st Pet. 2:12

5. For the glory of God. Our holiness should reflect God’s holiness: Eph. 5:25-27, Heb. 12:10-14

Now understanding that the Word of God speaks to this, this doesn’t make discipline the focal point of the church any more than taking an antibiotic becomes the focal point of life. But it is needed in all our lives. It is good to know that God has put us around other believers to help our walk and help us glorify him. We can’t let the Enemy use the extreme cases to cause us to disregard the Word of God. As a church we must love one another enough to exhort, encourage and, when necessary rebuke using the Word of God and the wonderful gift of Grace He first gave us!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Biblical Membership:

We live in a day that for many people, the idea of church membership seems antiquated. A day where some professing Christians believe they can be an entity unto themselves and do not need to be part of a local body of believers. The Word of God has never called us to be “lone ranger” Christians! In fact, whenever you see “church” mentioned in the New Testament, (with one possible exception in Matthew) it is always a local body. Now, someone claiming to be a believer with no attachment to a local body is not consistent with Scripture – it is a foreign concept according to the Word of God. Without going into great detail as to which specific doctrine will allow us to recognize what a church is, there is no doubt that there are some structural issues and biblical practices that must be carried out to be a true church. First, the Word of God clearly states that there must be called men of God who preach the Word, meaning you must have the office of elders. Now at Trinity, when we call a man on staff he must meet the qualification of an elder: our staff fills the role of elders at Trinity. Not only the issue of elders, but secondly there must be deacons and their selection and conduct be handled properly according to the Word of God. Third, the ordinances must be carried out - indicating not only The Lord’s Supper and Baptism, but also the accountability that is brought about through these ordinances among the family. The point is, that there are some in our day that have the idea that their family of 4 or 7 would constitute a biblical church. After reviewing these three basic structural “musts” - you can see where it would be a stretch, at best, but not at all practical. Can you truly carry out the call of the church within just a 4-7 member family venue? Now let me state very clearly that I don’t believe you have to meet in a building with a steeple on it to be a church. I believe you can have a church in a house, but just because you call your house a church doesn’t make it one. I can call my old Ford truck a Cadillac but it doesn’t make it so. If I were to start a church with my family of 4 with the goal teaching them, but not striving to reach others for Christ and get them involved in my church, I don’t think I could call my house a church.

I would also mention that my family needs other families. I need to watch other men interact with their children, my boys need to see other men that love Christ and serve him faithfully. I need to be around people that are different than myself – people that I may clash with in personality because this is where our Christianity is played out. If it isn’t displayed within a body of believers, then I would be hard pressed to call it real. When I become part of a body I am saying I am one of you, I am a believer. I am asking and expecting you to hold me accountable - I am in need of you encouraging me when life brings heartaches, and I should be there for you in the same time of need. Don’t try passing off the “I can worship in a deer stand” - the question I would submit is, do you? Do you lift your voice to sing praises? Do you gather with other believers for corporate worship? If you do this, I bet you never see any deer. The truth is that one may say they can - but they don’t. I have prayed in a deer stand; I have acknowledged the handiwork of God in a deer stand; but I can’t participate in public worship. The whole idea of Hebrews 10:25 is carried out in public worship. Any reader of the Word of God knows there was membership in the Bible. While the Word doesn’t say: “Thou shalt join a church”, over and over you see in Scripture the fact that membership is assumed for the believer. Let me give you some bullet points to close:


Heb. 13:7, 17: Obviously this is not speaking to just any spiritual leader having to give account for just any saved person. It was a member of this body with a Pastor who will give an account for them.

First Timothy 5:9. The phrase, “be taken into the number” could be translated as, “to be put on the list.” There was an obvious list of widows in the Church. Now certainly not every widow in the nation was listed. Only the widows of that Church. How would they know who belonged to that Church without membership?

1st Pet. 5:2-3 Who are the ones I am to shepherd? Is it just any believer, or actual members? Well the answer seems to be obvious.

1st Corinthians 5:12-13 The issue in these verses is church discipline. It says that we shouldn’t judge “outsiders” - who is that? Those who are not in our church. Then it says put the evil person out from “among you.” To be “out of” well, logic states I must have been “into.” Could you imagine in the Church of Corinth if this family who was involved in sexual immorality had a “our family only’ home church. Who would have corrected them? No one would have voted to throw mom out of the house would they?

The point is we need other believers around us. I need other people that do not look like me or like the same things I like - but we are of the same mind because we love and worship the same God. By all means, be part of a body - Don’t be one who just “shacks up” with a church and visits eternally! Pour your life into a church, laugh with them, cry with them, shout with them, but most importantly, worship with them!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Conversion and Evangelism:

I am putting these two marks together because I believe they go “hand in hand”, so to speak. Conversion is such a wonderful word – and yet it is seldom used among God’s people any more. If we misunderstand conversion then we will mess up evangelism. The two major elements of conversion are faith and repentance. These things are not worked up within me - they are not qualities that are yet untapped. The only way I can have saving faith and a conviction of my sin and wretchedness, is that God does a work in me. Now this certainly doesn’t exclude man’s action, but it is much deeper than us praying a prayer and going to church. As Dever mentions, we must have our hearts replaced. True conversion will bear fruit - it will change the way I see sin, the way I read the Word, the way I love the church. It involves not only preservation (that God will never let me go) but perseverance (that if I am truly a believer, I will endure to the end). If I understand that conversion is a work of God and God alone, it will also change the way I share the Gospel. Remember if we have a correct understanding of the Gospel, and we know what real biblical conversion looks like, it will not be very difficult to present the Gospel to the unconverted. We must be honest when we handle the Gospel - I’m not focused on a prayer, and I’m not coming to God to improve my life or give me “Hell insurance.” What our focus is when we present the Gospel is our unrighteousness and guilt before a holy God. We must present the fact that the cross is the place where the wrath of God fell on Christ as He became my sin, and where His righteousness is placed upon me. Too many times we miss the main elements of Faith in God, Repentance and Lordship. If you miss these things you miss the Gospel. We must get it right. If we don’t understand this, we will manipulate people to make decisions, we will take pride in “how many we have won” thereby robbing God of the glory that is due Him. We are not salesmen simply trying to get people to “make a decision today and you will win…” – we are giving people the truth their sinfulness according to the law of God and the good news of what Christ has done for us, our requirement to repent in faith and turn to Him. The truth is, this decision will cost them everything – it is not a cheap sales job!

When it comes to sharing the gospel, I am to do this as I am going. It goes beyond Monday night outreach, but it certainly should begin there. While there are always some exceptions with work and other schedules, the truth is you will seldom find one who has a passion for souls that isn’t faithful to outreach. I believe when you have a church with converted people, you will have people with a heart for evangelism. Which brings up a major point Dever mentions on page 90: “One sign that a church may not have a biblical understanding of conversion and evangelism is that its membership is markedly larger than its attendance.” This is a major problem specifically in our Baptist Churches. If all that our evangelism produces is numbers for Nashville, and not converts for Christ, then we have to ask if we are delivering the Gospel correctly! Real conversions produces change – and this change will impact your home, your church and a lost world!