Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Working Toward a Godly Marriage

Well, Michele and I are approaching our 20th wedding anniversary next month and, as we get closer to that date, I have been looking at and appreciating our marriage in a new way. While we have recently taken some time away to reflect on the last 20 years and where we have grown as a couple, we have made that a regular practice in our marriage since the very beginning. As a matter of fact, we have spent a great deal of time lately talking about, celebrating and strengthening our marriage. I think all of us need a tune up, tweak, and review every now and then - marriages don't stay healthy on their own or just with the mindset of "it will take care of itself." While having a godly, happy marriage may be your goal, it will never be accomplished if you don't work toward achieving it! I thank God for our marriage and our commitment to one another, but I also recommit myself daily to loving my wife in a way that pleases and honors God and the marriage He has given me.

Use these tips from the blog below to review and evaluate where your marriage is at, not waiting until trouble, apathy or indifference has set in. Or, if your marriage is already characterized by these adjectives, then use these tips to set goals and take action! Determine to make a difference.

http://timewarpwife.com/?p=3167

10 Things You Won’t Find In A Godly Marriage

Posted on May 14, 2014
With 41 Comments
Written by Matthew L. Jacobson

Could you stand up in a room and say, without embarrassment, “We’re not perfect but even so, I encourage you to follow our example in marriage?”
A godly couple can say this because of what’s missing from their marriage (and because of what’s there, but that’s another article). Sometimes it’s good when certain things go missing.

Here are 10 that have no place in a godly relationship:

1. A Sharp Tongue
It can be easy to cut with words when things don’t go our way but, in a godly marriage, neither spouse yields to this ungodly impulse. (James 3:8)
2. A Good Memory (when it comes to offenses).
A good memory can be very bad. After we repent of our sins before God, He doesn’t then commit them to memory so they can be thrown in our faces the next time we need to repent. The Bible says that God forgets our sins. When we repent and ask forgiveness of each other, they should never be referenced again. Remembering and repeating past wrongs will prevent the true fellowship that always follows true forgiveness. We are called to forgive as God has forgiven. (Col. 3:13)
3. A neglect of the Bibilical order in marriage.
In today’s culture, it’s practically hate speech by now, but if you desire to have a marriage ordered according to God’s structure and standards, read and live by Ephesians chapter 5.
4. A lack of care for how each other is doing.
Godly love engenders a genuine concern for one’s spouse. Communicating that love is as easy as, “Hey, how are you doing . . . really?” Love is kind. (1 Cor. 13:4)
5. A short temper or easily offended.
Godly couples are slow to become angry. (1 Cor. 13:5)
6. An unwillingness to sustain difficulty.
Godly couples have settled in for the long haul. Remember the old vow, “In sickness and in health?” Godly love bears all things. (1 Cor. 13:7)
7. Pride.
Pride says, “Notice me, talk about me, and focus on me.” The first thing you’ll hear or notice from a godly spouse is, “It’s not about me.” (1 Cor. 13:4)
8. A tearing down of one another.
Godly couples are busy . . . too busy lifting each other up to have the time to tear each other down by speaking negatively to others.
9. Thinking less than the best of each other.
Godly couples love first and ask questions later. They assume the best of the other person. (1 Cor. 13:7)
10. Taking pleasure in each other’s failings.
Love doesn’t rejoice when someone sins or falls, but rejoices in the truth. (1 Cor. 13:6)
It’s easy to get busy with life and treat marriage like it is something that is happening to us, instead of something we are doing. Maybe you’ve removed all of these negative, sinful behaviors from your marriage. If so, great! But, if not, take responsibility for what you are bringing to the relationship and take action to ensure these things are “missing” from your marriage – at least for the part of the relationship God entrusted to you . . . your part.
~ Matthew

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Praying for Your Children

This is a great blog from Kirk Cameron that should help parents think through how to pray for our children biblically. We tend to focus on the physical and protective - but do we think about and pray biblically significant things for our children's lives?

http://kirkcameron.com/four-things-pray-children/?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_m

Four Things to Pray for Your Children

A great article from Christina Fox
May 5, 2014

I pray for my children every day and all throughout the day. But I have a confession to make: most of my prayers are for immediate needs.

“God, please help my children not to reach out and touch the priceless works of art at the museum.”

“Please don’t let the tummy ache be a virus we all catch.”

“Please give me patience in homeschool today.”

You get the idea.

Prayer is often misunderstood, underused, and often doubted. Yet God uses our prayers to bring about his will. Some of the most remarkable answers to prayer include prisoners set free (Acts 12), the blind healed (Mark 10), and a thief given new life (Luke 23). John Piper wrote in A Godward Life that some things God ordains to come to pass only through the agency of prayer. If that something is not prayed for, it will not happen.

This is sobering for us as parents. Though praying for the health of our children or for behavioral concerns is good, it is also so much more. The options of things we could pray about for our children are endless, but here are four things we should never cease to pray:

1. That God Would Make Them Alive in Christ

Only the Holy Spirit can breathe new life into our children. We need to pray that the Spirit would be at work in them, opening their eyes to see, know, trust, and believe in Christ for their salvation.

2. That They Would Hunger and Thirst After God’s Word

Jesus prayed for the disciples that God would sanctify them by the truth, for his word is the truth (John 17: 17). The word of God is powerful and effective to change us. We need to pray our children would always want to study and learn God’s word so that they might know him better. God’s word is like manna to the soul. Without it, we wander in the wilderness, starving and feeding off of the tasteless and worthless morsels the world has to offer. We need to pray that our children would always find their soul filled and satisfied with the word of God.

3. That They Would Rely on the Gospel of Grace in Each and Every Moment

We live in a society where independence is valued. Scripture teaches otherwise. It teaches us to depend on Christ and his grace in everything. Prayer for our children should include prayers that they would depend and rely upon the gospel in all things, including sins, temptations, trials, hurts, fears, spiritual growth, and their work.

4. That They Would Know God’s Love

Paul prayed for the Ephesians, “that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses all knowledge” (3:17-19). This should be our prayer as well. When our children know the depths of God’s love for them in Christ, they will live like adopted children rather than orphans. They will rest and trust in what Christ has done for them. They will have confidence that Christ is all they need.

To paraphrase the words of Paul in 1 Thessalonians 5, may we pray without ceasing for our children.

Holding to Truth...by Pastor Chad Everson, Senior Pastor at Trinity