Living Out Forgiveness

In our Parental Guidance (PG) class we have been reading an outstanding book by Lou Priolo, entitled The Heart Of Anger and to simply say it is highly recommended would be an understatement! This Friday night we will be wrapping up the study of this book with our final PG class until the fall, so make your plans to “finish well” if you have been a part of this study with us!


So many times, in reading a book we will skip the appendix…but, in the appendix of this wonderful book we see the following verses: (don’t skip it!)

Ephesians 4:32 “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”

Jeremiah 31:34 No more shall every man teach his neighbor, and every man his brother, saying, ‘Know the LORD,’ for they all shall know Me, from the least of them to the greatest of them, says the LORD. For I will forgive their iniquity, and their sin I will remember no more.”

We can know for a fact that God doesn’t have amnesia! As we have seen through our “Wonderful Words” series, God imputed our sin to Christ and imputes His righteousness to us because he was our substitute on Calvary. All of God’s wrath that should have fallen on me, fell on Him. What a glorious truth. So, when the Father sees me, He sees me in the righteousness of Christ and I am truly forgiven. But, the question I am faced with now is, “How do I forgive as Christ has forgiven me?” In light of Priolo’s book, I want to offer you three promises that must be included to forgive biblically:

1. Forgiveness is a promise not to hold the offense against the other: The tendency when one is hurt is to lash out and utter such words as: “You always do this” or “You said you were sorry the last time.” Forgiveness states that you are releasing them from “last time.” You will not use past sins against the person. The issue is “off limits” and will not be brought up again. You must capture those thoughts and remind yourself that you have forgiven that sin; that it is over.

2. You promise that you will not discuss the past offense with another: People love gossip - our deceitful hearts love negativity and slander. If we have been offended or sinned against and have not truly forgiven the other, we love to tell others. Our sinful minds can justify anything we want to do. So, if I have been hurt, I need to make sure I just “share my heart” or “release my pain.” Ahhh…but God still calls that gossip.

3. You promise that you will not dwell on the offense of the other: You may be one of those VERY rare people who won’t gossip about the hurt, but you will dwell on it. You can act like everything is okay on the outside but you hold it and replay it in your mind… and convince yourself you have a right to do so. The only problem is we have no rights - they were purchased at the cross! This dwelling on it, replaying it – only leads to anger and bitterness. Eventually you will resent the person or, the next time they do something, your emotional response to them will be so “snowballed” that it is overwhelming to you and them. Bottom line, forgiveness is choosing not to hold on to that offense or that sin. You have to stop those thoughts and remind yourself that you have chosen to forgive.

So remember our passion should be to love like Christ and forgive like Christ - and if you have lived any time at all, you know that takes a constant work of grace, and we still fall short all too often. There have been wonderful books written on this very subject, but one of my favorites is The Freedom And Power Of Forgiveness, by John MacArthur. It is a wonderful book that will be a great asset to you as you seek to grow in this area! Forgiveness is a concept we speak of so casually on the outside, but very few of us truly deal with at the heart level – so we harm ourselves and others in our relationships by not truly forgiving.

PG - Parental Guidance Classes at Trinity Baptist Church

Parenting is a difficult task! It is a job that is highly rewarding, yet at the same time extremely challenging to say the least. But, I praise the Lord that He has not given these precious gifts and then simply turned us loose. Rather, our Lord provides guidance through His Word and through the gift of His Holy Spirit with all wisdom, endurance, long-suffering, and grace!

With our new PG – Parental Guidance sessions, our desire is to look into God’s Word for parental guidance so that we can guide our children in a manner that will help them grow in God’s grace.

We will gather together once per month, on Friday evenings, to focus on the truths of God and apply them practically in our homes. Our time together will be mutually edifying as we share our questions and struggles, pray together, and strive to be the parents God has called us to be.

For our first PG classes, we will be reading through the book, The Heart of Anger by Lou Priolo. You will need to purchase the workbook that corresponds with the book. Both the book and the workbook can be purchased at the book table now.

Has your child or children ever talked back to you, or rolled their eyes? Has your child ever talked disrespectfully to you or a sibling? Do you have children who fight with one another, even over the most miniscule things? Have you ever lost your cool in dealing with issues in the home?

I can’t speak for you, but I can for me and my house. All of the above has, and does happen. So, now what: How can I respond to anger issues with my children that will not only solve the problem, but will also train them and prepare them for life? How can I address the heart issues that result in anger responses that are sinful?

In The Heart of Anger, we will look at such topics as:

• Angry Attitudes
• Provocative Parents
• Discipline: What it Really Means
• Practical Biblical Communication
• Disrespect and Manipulation
• The Appeal Process

Here are the details for the class:

Cost: The cost of the book ($16) and workbook ($15), The Heart of Anger. These books are sold at the book table and the book is available for check out from the church library on a first come, first serve basis.

Schedule:         From 6:30 – 8:00 pm

• Friday, January 21
• Friday, February 18 
• Friday, March 25 
• Friday, April 15

Childcare is provided for each of these classes.

You can sign up at the ticket counter for these classes. We ask that you go ahead and get the book and work through the first three chapters of the book/workbook prior to our January 21st meeting. If you are just finding out about this class and would like to attend but have not completed these chapters, please do not let it keep you from attending!

Let me know if you have any questions at jsummers@trinitysouthaven.org